"Poor Little Greenie"....*

The other day I came home from work and I was surprised when I didn't see all of the kitties sitting in the front window anxiously awaiting my arrival. I was a tad more concerned when I got out of my car and Lorenzo wasn't in the kitchen window bellowing my welcome home as he has done every day of his life. I quickened my pace to the front door and lowered my purse towards the ground as I walk through the threshold trying to thwart the inevitable escape attempts, but alas...no one was trying to escape. My heart dropped because I immediately assumed that all of the kitties must have gotten out and were roaming the neighborhood....then...out of the corner of my eye I saw one kitty emerge...and then another...and then all of them came to greet me. They had that sleepy, content aura about them, sort of like when they had exhausted their poor little kitty selves when they spent all day rearranging the bathroom for me. Everything appeared to be in it's place but oddly enough no one was climbing up my leg looking for the cans of cat food I keep hidden in my hair. Lorenzo was all but silent and he is NEVER silent.


"Why aren't you guys hungry?", I asked. My answer was just a bunch of lazy blinks and a slight brush of my ankle. I went ahead and opened a can of food and Willow sort of mosied over to the bowl and attempted to take a few bites. I could tell that he was doing this in an effort to make me happy and not because he was completely starving, totally ready to parish, on his last calorie like he is every other day.

"Are all of you guys sick?", I asked as I bent down to pick up the one remaining white kitten. "Your belly is suspiciously full....what have you been eating?", I said to him. We have been crafting the last few nights and my first thought was that the kitten had found a silk flower or a ribbon and had chowed down on it. Of course that wouldn't explain why none of the others were hungry.

I chalked it up to the fact that it had been a super hot day and they were probably just too hot to eat and the white kitten had probably gone over board eating the crunchy food during the day and just didn't have any room left for the canned food.

Then as I walked down the hallway towards my bedroom I found this:

Just last night this had been a brand new bag of "Greenies" cat treats. (*I can never look at this brand of treats without singing to myself David Bowie's song, "Jean Genie". There is a line in that song that says, "Poor little greenie..."thus the title of this post.) I've never read the ingredients before but I'm pretty certain that they contain crack and heroin and meth. My cats go nutty freakin coo coo over these treats. They are kind of expensive so I only pass them out when I want to distract the kitties from whatever I'm doing, like the aforementioned crafting. Apparently they didn't think they had been given enough so after I left for work someone, and I'm pretty sure it had to be Lorenzo, knocked them off of the kitchen counter and then it was probably a tag team effort to get the bag ripped open. Ashleigh loves to chew on things as do both of the kittens so I can only imagine the field day that was had when they were trying to get to the booty inside of the foil/plastic bag.

There is no doubt that Lorenzo didn't allow Elijah to have any of the ill gotten goodies so I took the few crumbs that remained and fed them to Elijah in the bathroom. For the first time in his life I heard Elijah purr and then he chirped. Elijah has been my gentle little boy who was a sick kitten in the hospital when I came home from Europe last year. Because he is the weakest of the cat mob Lorenzo picks on him relentlessly. Elijah is afraid of everything and everybody...but all it took was a handful of "Greenies" crumbs and all of a sudden I have a new best friend. If I had known this was going to be the outcome I would have left the opened bag of "Greenies" in the hallway months ago. I haven't heard him purr or chirp again yet but Elijah actually sat next to me, touching me, which has never happened before. I think I see more clandestine "Greenies" fests in the bathroom in Elijah's future.

I apologize for the spacing in this post. I have played with it and tried to fix it but apparently Blogspot isn't going to participate. Idiot foolish Blogspot.